


thought love was dead but now you're changing my mind

by adashofhope



Series: if you're hearing this [1]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Crushes, F/M, Getting to Know Each Other, Insecurities, Issues, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Mild Sexual Tension, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Teen Angst, a little vague, i apologise in advance, in case you haven't noticed, it's michelle centric, it's not that long because i'm a little lazy, little mj and little peter, this is very messy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-09
Updated: 2017-09-09
Packaged: 2018-12-25 16:15:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12039579
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/adashofhope/pseuds/adashofhope
Summary: michelle jones is done with all the soulmate bullshit around her. especially when she knows that it isn't forever.





	thought love was dead but now you're changing my mind

**Author's Note:**

> this is a soulmate au inspired by @peraltiagoisland 's fic but with a very michelle/peter twist. also, sorry for the cheesy ass title, i was listening to stereo hearts on repeat when i wrote this.

“ _Mama, how did you and papa fall in love?” Five-year old Michelle had asked her mother curiously._

_Michelle’s mother smiled in that motherly way and looked over at her husband who had simply returned the smile before making a turn._

_Michelle was impatient. “What is it?” she pressed, trying and failing to be intimidating because of her lisp._

_“In this world, we fall in love with our soulmate.” Michelle nodded in understanding before frowning, “But where’s my soulmate? I want to fall in love!”_

_“Oh no, you don’t,” her father looked at her when he stopped at a red light. “Your soulmate is going to have to get through me first,” he puffed his chest, making Michelle giggle adorably._

_Mrs Jones rolled her eyes lovingly at her husband and looked at her daughter who laid in her lap, “You and your soulmate will be able to hear each other’s thoughts. One day,_ _maybe when you’re older, you’re going to hear someone else’s voice in your head. That person is your soulmate!”_

_“Yay!” Michelle exclaimed in the way that only five year-olds could pull off but then she paused, “Can I talk to my soulmate now?_

_‘_ _Yes, but only in your head.”_

_“Ok!” Michelle furrowed her eyebrows together, waiting for her soulmate(s) to hear her as she tried to convey a sweet little message with her mind, ‘Hello, soulmate! I can’t wait to meet you and fall in love with you!’_

_“Done!” Michelle nodded in satisfaction, as her ponytail bounced along with her._

_“Well, what did you tell them?” her Dad asked._

_“I told ‘em that I can wait to meet them and to fall in love with them.”_

_The Jones’ smiled at their little girl, already proud of her._

* * *

 

_Michelle clutched onto her mother’s leg, begging her not to leave._

_Her mother sucked in a deep breath, her hand resting on her suitcase, “Honey, I’m only going to be gone for a while. I’ll be back soon.”_

_The tears flowed freely as she shook her head, “No, you won’t. You’re not coming back, I know it!”_

_Her mother looked to her dad for help and he wiped at his eyes, grabbing the little girl and holding her in his arms, “It’s ok, MJ. I’m here, daddy’s here!”_

_"Momma! Don’t leave me! Don’t leave us!” Michelle’s mom only uttered her goodbyes and rolled her suitcase down the hallway, shutting the front door behind her._

_After a few hours of wailing, Michelle looked at the man before her. ”Papa, why did mom leave us? I thought you were soulmates.”_

_Mr Jones looked at her, his eyes softening, “I thought so too, babygirl.”_

___When eight year-old Michelle saw the hurt in her father’s eyes, she decided that, “Well, soulmates are bull..bullshit! You have me, papa and you have Lily! Please don’t be sad.”_

_Her father chuckled and engulfed her in a hug, stroking her hair lovingly before saying, “I’ll try, MJ.”_

* * *

 

Michelle only heard from her soulmate when she was ten. She was at her cousin’s birthday party and everyone was fawning over him because he had heard from his soulmate.

It was quite sweet actually.

Apparently, her cousin, Darnell had wished to hear from his soulmate and as if on cue, a voice had appeared in his head saying, ‘But I’m right here.’

And Darnell, bless his 13 year old heart, had gasped audibly in front of the whole family, “Holy shit, it’s you.”

Michelle sulked in the corner -although the whole exchange had been very heartwarming- as she listened to her father trying to explain the concept of soulmates to her little sister, Lily.

‘ _Soulmates are bullshit._ ’ she thought.

‘ _What? Why?_ ’ she heard a high-pitched voice, ask disappointedly.

This couldn’t be happening. Out of all the sweet things she had tried to convey to her soulmate telepathically, he had to hear this.

‘ _Oh my God. You’re my-‘_

‘ _Soulmate, yes. Why don’t you like me?_ ’ he sounded sad, disappointed.

Michelle felt the guilt instantly sink into her, ‘ _No, no, I don’t not like you…I was in a sour mood, that’s all._ ’

‘ _So you like me?_ ’ his voice was hopeful.

She smiled unconsciously, ‘ _I guess…_ ’

‘ _I like you too,_ ’ he said shyly.

And the connection went out.

Michelle melted in an instant. “MJ?” her dad asked.

“Dad, I…just heard my soulmate.”

Her dad’s eyes widened but then he smiled at her as her little sister held her hand and demanded that she tell her everything about her soulmate.

* * *

 

She hears from him a week later.

 _‘I wish I were an Avenger._ ’

She replied instantly, ‘ _Why do you want to be an Avenger?_ ’

‘ _Oh hey, I just want to be really cool with superpowers and…_ ’ he punctuated the sentence with a very animated version of an Avengers fight, complete with all the explosion noises and villain impressions.

MJ laughed out loud, earning a few looks from the kids on the bus, ‘ _That’s cute._ ’

‘ _What’s cute?_ ’ MJ’s eyes widened. What kind of loser would momentarily forget that your soulmate has the ability to hear your thoughts?

 _‘Um, I meant, you’re cute._ ’

‘ _That’s funny. May always says-_ ‘

And they got cut off.

Michelle sighed audibly, not caring about the weird looks she was receiving from her peers as she looked out the window, wondering if her soulmate was closer than she thought.

* * *

 

She never heard from him again.

Or well, until she was 14.

‘ _Man, Gwen is really pretty._ ’

Michelle felt her heart drop as she tried to remain calm, ‘ _Who’s Gwen?_ ’'

No answer. Her Dad had told her about this. They were one-sided thoughts. Sometimes, you could hear your soulmates’ thoughts but you couldn’t respond to them telepathically- that made her wonder if he’d ever had one-sided thoughts from her before.

She tried to remain optimistic about whoever this Gwen was, and how pretty she was.

Maybe, it was his little sister, all dressed up and getting him emotional like how her dad got whenever she wore a dress.

Or maybe, Gwen was the title of a drawing or an art sculpture in an art exhibit that he was currently at that was so pretty, he was blown away.

Maybe, Gwen was a TV character he was crushing on- which made a lot of sense, actually because Michelle had most definitely been there.

Michelle told herself that she had nothing to worry about. Her soulmate wouldn’t do that to her.

From then on, she would hear frequent one-sided thoughts from his end. Mostly about Star Wars and comic books, or about some twat named Flash. Sometimes even when he was answering one of his unbelievably easy English Lit questions wrong and she would try very hard to resist the urge to yell at him- telepathically. He was cute, a cute nerd who definitely belonged in Gryffindor.

Then, she heard it again. ‘ _Did Liz get a new top?_ ’ MJ was in the midst of absolutely destroying some ignorant kid on the opposition team when she heard his voice, making her stop dead in her tracks with her eyes wide, looking like a deer caught in the headlights. Thankfully, her friend, Cindy realised what was happening and took over for her.

Just as she was about to respond, she heard him again, ‘ _Should probably stop staring before it gets creepy, though._ ’

Michelle wracked her brain for a Liz until she came to a realisation. Could her soulmate be thinking about Liz Allen? What if her soulmate was someone in Midtown?

Michelle took a step backwards, trying to process this newfound information. Almost everyone at school has had a crush on Liz at some point. Heck, even Michelle used to have a crush on her. She knew that there wasn’t a 100% chance of her soulmate being someone from Midtown but she had already managed to convince herself that it was someone here who had a crush on Liz. She shook her head as she decided to focus on the debate going on before her, pushing her soulmate to the back of her mind.

* * *

 

A few days later, she heard from him again.

‘ _I wish Liz were my soulmate. She’s perfect._ ’

That one stung.

She was working on a frustrating math problem when he decided to crush her heart with his thoughts. She was almost certain that the Liz her soulmate was talking about was the same Liz that went to Midtown Tech now.

She knew Liz was perfect but Liz and her, they were so different. Her soulmate wanted someone like Liz, someone kind, sweet, and all around perfect but he had to end up with someone like MJ, someone who was sarcastic, blunt, nosy and deeply flawed.

She tried to focus on her math problem, but she kept getting the wrong answer. She grabbed her sheet of paper and reread her working in her head.

‘ _You forgot to carry the two._ ’

MJ looked at her paper and sure enough, her soulmate was right.

‘ _Are you there?_ ’ he asked.

MJ wanted to reply, she really did.

She wanted to talk to him, but she knew he was going to be disappointed anyway. She focused on her math equation, willing herself to not think about anything else that would give her away.

‘ _Huh, must be another one-sided thought._ ’

Maybe, her soulmate would love her. Maybe, he would date her for a while, marry her even, and they’d have kids of their own but what if he left? What if he walked away, like her mother did? What if he realised that he had never wanted this and he had only married her because she was his soulmate?

Soulmates are bullshit.

* * *

 

Maybe if her soulmate wasn’t so obvious, she wouldn’t have figured it out.

All in all, she was proud of herself, because she managed to figure out who her soulmate was with nothing but one-sided thoughts.

Thoughts about Liz, about the Star Wars model he was going to build with Ned soon, about Aunt May, about Flash, about Spider-Man’s web shooters, about Tony Stark (her soulmate had a strange obsession with Spider-Man and Iron-Man. It was really weird, but then again, her soulmate was a huge nerd.)

Those were what gave him away.

It all happened when Cindy had practically forced her to join the Decathlon team.

She saw him trying to reason with Mr Harrington.

“What’s his deal?” she whispered in Cindy’s ear, looking at the boy in disgust.

“He’s trying to quit the team. Saying he can’t even make it for the Nationals.” Cindy rolled her eyes, and dragged her to Liz.

As he left the auditorium, he caught her eye and she knew.

She knew that Peter Parker was her soulmate. It made sense, really. Peter Parker was Flash’s #1 target. The whole school knew about his infatuation with Liz. He was Ned Leeds’ only friend. Who else would be her soulmate?

Peter ended up quitting a few days later. She liked it that way. She was not about to have him find out that the girl he’d been talking to since he was ten years-old was Midtown’s resident weirdo, Michelle Jones. Her gameplan was to avoid the boy at all costs. Of course, there were times where he’d offer her a friendly smile in the hallways or he would think about approaching her but she tried her best to look intimidating. She was not going to talk to him at all. Maybe, he wouldn’t be able to recognize her voice since the last time they had an actual telepathic conversation was when she was 10 but he had definitely heard a bunch of one-sided thoughts from her before. Her plan had nearly gone to waste when he decided to join the team again as they were leaving for D.C but she made it a point to not talk to anyone on the bus ride and he never showed up for the Nationals anyway so she was safe.

It had been fine, all throughout the days leading up to Homecoming, she had stuck by Ned’s side. Turns out, he wasn’t so bad after all.

She ignored the pang in her chest when he had walked through the doors of the gym and made a beeline for Liz. She followed him with her gaze curiously when he sprinted out of the gym as Ned trailed behind him.

Instead, she spent the night with Liz, Betty Brant and Cindy- all of them agreeing that Peter was a dick as they tried to cheer her up. She had fun that night.

Then, it all changed.

Liz’s mom had taken the liberty of sending her home. Liz walked her to the door and thanked her for trying to cheer her up when her date had ditched her. Michelle winced at the mention of Peter and Liz realised. “Oh my God, it’s him, isn’t it?”

Michelle had furrowed her eyebrows in confusion at that time, “What? Who is what?”

“Peter! He’s your soulmate!” Michelle’s eyes widened as she tried to deny it. How did Liz even know about that?

“Don’t deny it, MJ. He’s your soulmate, isn’t he? That’s why you’ve been so weird around him! I’ve noticed the way you act around him, don’t be surprised.” Liz stopped her from denying it any further.

Michelle was rarely, if ever caught off guard. She was at a loss for words. What was she supposed to say? No point in denying it now. “Wh-How did you even figure it out?!”

Liz smirked. Was Liz even capable of smirking? “Michelle, honey, first of all, you stare at Peter a lot. Like, too much to be considered as ‘observing’ him.” Liz looked at her pointedly, crossing her arms.

“He’s a flake! He’s definitely hiding something and I want to know what it is!” Michelle reasoned.

“Anyway, whenever we talk about soulmates, you always end up looking at him and if anyone in this world were to figure out who their soulmate was, it would be you. Cindy told me that you’ve figured out who your soulmate is but you don’t want anything to do with him and there’s that time on the bus ride to D.C where you faked a sore throat just to avoid participating in the drills.”

“Speaking of, why don’t you want him to know that you’re soulmates?” Michelle looked down at her sneakers and back at Liz.

It wouldn’t hurt to tell her, right?

“I’m scared.” That was the first time she had ever admitted it to herself.

“Scared of what? Peter’s a sweetheart.”

“I know that, but he doesn’t want someone like me. He wants someone like you, Liz!”

“What? He’s told you that?”

“I’ve heard his thoughts.” Liz’s face dropped. Her face morphed into a look of sympathy and Michelle hated it. Liz knew about her parents, and in that moment, Liz probably understood the reasoning behind MJ’s behaviour. Before she knew it, she was pulled into a bear hug by Liz, “Feel better, MJ.”

A few hours later, she heard the news- that New York’s beloved hero, Spider-Man had exposed Adrian Toomes aka Liz’s Dad aka The Vulture as an arms dealer, dealing stolen alien technology from post-battle clean-ups and had just been arrested by the NYPD. She fired out a text to everyone on the Decathlon Team -besides Liz-, telling them to not bother her with their questions, or else.

The next day at school, she saw Liz and Peter, talking to each other. Liz was holding her things, wiping at her eyes furiously as Peter looked sorry.

‘ _He better be sorry’_ , she thought, as she gathered her things from her locker. ‘ _He’s the one who bailed on her last night._ ’

As if on cue, Peter whipped his head around the hallway, looking for something- or someone.

Michelle’s eyes widened as she suddenly got very interested in one of her blank notebooks. He heard her thoughts. Oh God, he heard her thoughts.

Peter’s eyes scanned the hallway until his eyes landed on her. He stared at her shamelessly as she glared at her very empty notebook. Her heart was beating a mile a minute. One wrong move, and he would’ve probably figured it out. She looked up from her book and glared at him as she flipped him off, making him avert his eyes quickly.

When Peter walked away from Liz, he stared at her oddly as Liz motioned for her to come over. Liz pulled her into yet another hug, “Good luck with school and Peter.”

She didn’t notice Peter staring at the two girls or the confusion in his eyes when he felt something click in his chest.

A few hours later, she was the new captain of Midtown Tech’s decathlon team. Apparently, Liz had nominated her.

She spared a glance at Peter who was staring at her with those big, brown eyes as he clapped along with the rest of the team. It was inevitable. She was going to have to talk to Peter at some point and he was going to recognize her voice. In that moment, she came up with a new plan; denial.

Peter was going to hear her voice, and maybe he was going to try to talk to her about it, but soulmates have mistaken someone else’s voice for their other half’s voice before. She’d read about it before. That was the card that she was going to play with Peter. She felt bad for a second, because maybe Peter had been waiting to meet his soulmate for long too. He deserved to know too. She got over it then, because she was saving him the disappointment and saving herself from living a repeat of her parents’ situation.

“Uh, thank you,” she nodded at the team. “My friends call me MJ.”

From her peripheral vision, she could see Peter putting the pieces together, staring at her in shock. “I thought you said that you didn’t have any friends,” Ned looked at her, giving her someone to look at other than Peter.

“I don’t.” MJ nodded, focusing on the table as Mr Harrington began to talk.

The ping of a text sounded through the library as Peter looked down at his phone and back at Mr Harrington apologetically, “I have to go…” Something bloomed in her chest at his voice. That was the first time that she had ever heard him say something in real life. It was him, it really was him.

He seemed to be looking at her for some sort of reaction so she decided to throw him off, “Wait, where are you going?”

He looked at her, his mouth trying to form an answer. She placed her elbows on her table and leaned forward, scrutinizing him, “What are you hiding, Peter?”

Peter looked at Ned and then looked at her, his mouth hanging open, eyes wide.

She chuckled, looking down at the table. “I’m just kidding, I don’t care. Bye!” she waved at him cheerily before facing the team, her team.

“Alright, so we’re going to start with the drills…” she trailed off, getting out her flashcards and setting up as everyone got ready with their things. When she was sure that no one was looking, she watched him leave the library, her heart fluttering like it did when she first heard from him.

* * *

 

Things were good at school. Ned talked to her a lot- you could say that they were friends now, although he pretended to be exasperated by her all the time. Cindy was as ecstatic as ever, now that Michelle was Captain.

And Peter, well, he did act really weird around her for a few weeks as expected since he had just figured out that she was his soulmate. He never really asked her anything about it, he had started talking to her a lot, though which would normally get on her nerves but this was Peter, so it was endearing. She figured that maybe he didn’t actually think she was his soulmate, maybe he thought it was her for a second but convinced himself that she wasn’t his soulmate. He did stare at her a lot, as if he was trying to figure her out.

One day, this really annoying kid on the opposition debate team had gone up to her and told her that she was annoying and ‘such a bitch’. To which, she responded with, “Why, thank you. I try my best.”

He wasn’t satisfied with just a jab at her though, “Must be why your mom walked out on you.”

She was thankful that Cindy had pulled her away from the kid before any damage had actually been done. Flash, who had witnessed the whole scene had punched the kid square on the jaw because, “I may be annoying, but I’m not an asshole and I don’t like it when assholes fuck with my friends.”

She sucked it up, pretending that everything was fine and that it didn’t hurt for the rest of the day but when she reached home and her little sister had told her all about this kid who was picking on her for not having a mom and how her soulmate had helped her think of a quick comeback, she had merely smiled and told her that she was heading up to the roof to sketch the city.

Michelle never noticed when the tears had started falling and she definitely didn’t notice the flash of red and blue from the corner of her eye.

She never noticed someone else’s presence behind her until he spoke. “Well, hello there, citizen. I couldn’t help but to notice that you look a little sad and that you’re uh, standing by the edge of the…roof which is very dangerous, so um, you need any help?” he said in a voice that sounded a lot like Captain America’s voice.

Michelle whipped around and clutched onto her sketchpad as if it was going to make the Spider-Man thing go away. “I’m fine, thanks.”

“Are you sure, ma’am, because-“

“Really, I’m fine.”

“My friend says, I’m a really good listener?” he offered.

Michelle tilted her head, observing his body language, “It’s nothing you’ll care about anyway, just some dick at school.”

“My job is to protect the citizens of New York. I don’t uh…want you to deal with this alone or anything.”

Michelle crossed her arms and smiled at him, squinting a little from the glare of the Sun in her eye, “Your job?”

“My responsibility.” he corrected.

“Well, Spider-Man, if you really do want to listen to the problems of a 17 year-old girl,” she shrugged and sat down on the ground, flipping her sketchpad shut.

“I’m on the debate team, and we crushed it today, like **crushed it** but this kid from the losing team was not having it so he may or may not have hit a sore spot whilst insulting me.”

“No way, like literally?” he was next to her now.

“Figuratively, I wouldn’t let an asshole actually hit me and then get away with it,” she rolled her eyes.

“Um, what was the uh, you know…the thing that he said, if you don’t mind me asking?” Michelle looked at him and considered telling him.

He seemed like a decent guy, saves people on a daily basis, and what was he going to do with the information anyway? He didn’t personally know her, so she wouldn’t have to deal with questions every now and then or looks of sympathy.

“I guess I could tell you. I don’t uh, have a mom,” she paused, gauging his reaction but then realising that he had a mask on so it was pointless, “because she left, like when I was eight. The asshole basically said that I was the reason that my mom left and you know, maybe it’s kinda true. Maybe, I wasn’t a good enough reason for her to stay.”

Michelle held her palm between them, “Before you say anything, yes, my mom and dad were soulmates but she still ended up leaving anyway. Soulmates are bullshit.” She heard the click of his eye-thingys widening.

After a minute or so, he spoke,“I see. Have you met your uh…soulmate?”

“Yes,” her head hung low.

“Don’t you like your soulmate?”

Michelle looked at Spider-Man, “Don’t get me wrong, I had the biggest crush on him for-like, ever but then um…I heard some of his one-sided thoughts and I don’t think that he wants me as a soulmate so I’m kind of keeping my distance, saving him the disappointment and saving myself from getting hurt again.”

His voice was a little quiet, “You think he’s going to leave you?”

“I mean, sure he’s probably going to date me, marry me, maybe we’ll even have a kid, who knows? Then, he’s going to end up leaving- like my mom did and I really, don’t think I’ll be able to go through that again.”

They fell into a silence again and Michelle couldn’t help but wonder about how odd this situation was. Spider-Man was basically a celebrity around New York, but here he was, talking to a 17 year-old girl, -though she believed he was probably only a few years older- about her insecurities and her deepest fears.

“It’s not your fault, you know.”

Michelle looked at him.

“I don’t know your mom, and I don’t know why she left but, I don’t think it’s because of you. I mean, I’ve only known you for like 20 minutes, and you’re a really cool girl. Also, your soulmate would be lucky to have you.”

Michelle ignored the swelling of her chest and smiled at him as she stood up, dusting herself off, “Well, thank you for the heart-to-heart, Spider-Man, but I better get going.”

He stood there for a while, before saying, “Ah yeah, me too. I’ll see you around?”

“Really?”

“Why not?”

“Don’t you have cats to rescue?”

“Haha,” he deadpanned. “But seriously, I have time.”

“So you’ll just randomly bump into me and start talking to me?”

“Yes.”

“Sounds like a plan.”

* * *

Never in a million years would Michelle have thought that she'd have an actual crush on Spider-Man. Then again, Michelle wouldn't have thought that a superhero called Spider-Man would exist.

He did keep up to his word. The roof of her apartment became a regular meet-up spot. Their meetings were never planned. Most of the time, she would go up to the roof to read, or sketch, and he would swing by with a “Hey, stranger!” before returning after catching the bad guys. There were times where he would never return to the roof or where he wouldn’t be swinging around New York when she was out on the roof but those rarely ever happened.

He was sweet, cute, a little talkative and very, very familiar- she hadn’t yet put her finger on who exactly it was that reminded him of her. It was inevitable that she would have a crush on him.

“Hey, we always talk about my soulmate. Have you met yours?” she asked him one day as he sat down next to her.

He scratched the back of his neck, “Uh, yeah.”

Michelle leaned forward, “So, aren’t you going to tell me about her? Or, is that classified information?”

“I’m trying to win her over.”

“Win her over? But she’s your soulmate, all you have to do is, walk up to her, tell her that you’re her soulmate, maybe cry a little, and boom!”

“I wish it were that easy.” He chuckled.

“Well, what’s she like?”

“Super cool, very adorable though, she likes to think of herself as scary. Oh, and she’s really, really smart- like she could be an evil genius! Although, that would suck because then I would have to fight her and I really don’t want to fight her but she’s super chill so she probably doesn’t care about taking over the world. Or does she?”

“You sound like you really like her.” Michelle nodded. She wished Peter liked her that much.

“I do. I’m just waiting for her to realise that.”

“Well, good luck, buddy.”

* * *

It happened on a random Tuesday.

She had brushed her lips against his before pulling away quickly, her eyes widening, “We-I can’t.”

Spider-Man licked his lips, “Why not?”

His voice was obviously generated. Now that she could see his lips moving, she could tell that what she was hearing wasn’t actually his real voice.

“Our soulmates!” MJ reasoned.

“But you don’t like your soulmate!”

She stood up, “I never said that!”

His voice was small, hopeful even, “So, you like him?”

“I guess, yeah. I don’t know…it’s complicated! Fuck, this is messing me up.” she was pacing now.

“And me? What about me?” he was closer to her now, a little too close, maybe.

She looked right at him before looking down at her shoes, “I like you too.”

He took a step closer, making her take a step back.

“See, the thing about liking me,” he walked closer to her and she backed away, until she was pinned against the door of the roof.

“...And liking him is that, it doesn’t matter.” MJ crossed her arms, ready to fire a comeback about how her feelings most definitely mattered, especially because he was one of the only people who could ever make her feel like…this but then he kissed her.

This time, he was the one who initiated the kiss. She felt him sigh against her lips. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer before it ended. When they pulled away, she could feel him looking at her- even with his mask on.

“The truth is, that it doesn’t matter because…” and he took off his mask.

MJ’s jaw dropped, “Oh my God.”

“MJ? Say something, please.”

That was Peter Parker. She had been talking to Peter Parker all along. Peter Parker had just kissed her. He had known all along, about her parents, her fears, about her denial. That’s why he hadn’t said anything to her in school about the soulmate situation. She should’ve known. Spider-Man had always reminded her of Peter Parker. That’s who it was. From the way he walked, to the way he talked too much, or just how right the kiss felt.

It was all too much for her, at the moment. She reached for the door knob behind her, turning around to tug on it. Spider-Man, or well, Peter, steadied her with his arms on her waist when she stumbled a little. She felt his hot breath on her shoulder and she turned around, holding onto the open door for dear life. “I need to…” she pointed at the open door with her thumb before slipping behind it and shutting the door, doing the one thing she hated.

Leaving.

* * *

She ignored Peter for weeks, she stopped going out to the roof. She saw Peter looking at her at school and she knew he would be up there on her rooftop but she never spoke to him. She never planned on liking him, on almost potentially falling for Peter Parker.

Why did she even end up having a crush on Spider-Man?

Maybe, it was because he was good. He made her blush a lot. He would get overly excited about kicking some villain’s ass. Maybe, it had to do with his bad science puns. The way he would lean back and watch her draw New York’s skyline. Maybe, it was how he would arrive on the roof with some song stuck in his head and he wouldn’t stop humming it or how he would laugh at her sarcastic opinions about some of the kids at school.

Perhaps, it was how he would say something overly sweet and cheesy about her and made her swoon or how he would sit back and listen to her rant about anything and everything for hours, laughing in all the right places. Maybe, it had to do with how he would hug her –blood on his suit and all- telling her that no one in their right mind would ever leave her.

Either way, it took her some time to realise that she had been nursing a crush on Peter Parker all this time.

Even on the days where she would tell him about how she was a catch and that her soulmate would be damn lucky to have her and he would agree with a little chuckle, it had always been Peter Parker.

When her little sister burst into her room, telling her about her soulmate and telling Michelle that she was so lucky for knowing who her soulmate really was, Michelle decided that she was done with avoiding him.

That night, she went up to the roof, silently praying that he would be there and when he was, a heart skipped a beat. His mask was on and he was looking down at the streets below.

“You’re a little too close to the roof, Spider-Man.” He turned around, pulling his mask off in a swift movement.

The corners of his mouth tilted up a little in surprise, “MJ.”

He was a little out of breath as she walked to him, “Hi.”

Eyes wide and voice a little squeaky, he spoke, “Hey.”

She dared to take a step closer, “I’m sorry.”

Peter frowned, “What?”

“All this avoiding I was doing, it was because I was scared, but I’m here now and well…” she looked at her hands and back at him trying to string the right words to say to him.

When she looked up again, he was unbelievably close. He cupped her face slowly, gently pushing her head lower.

His voice was lower, softer, “Can I kiss you?” She leaned in, brushing her lips against his ever so slightly before looking at him. He looked at her before pulling her head closer to his, smashing their lips together, kissing her the way he had really wanted to.

Somewhere along the kiss, Michelle had wrapped her arms around his neck and he had literally swept her off her feet, holding her above the ground (blame Spider-Man).

When they’d pulled away, she had chuckled, her forehead on his, “You’re a dork.”

Peter grinned cheesily, leaning forward to capture her lips in another kiss.

In that moment, Michelle knew she’d be alright.

She knew that she would be alright when she’d wake up next to Peter after a recurring nightmare and he would whisper sweet nothings into her ear until she fell asleep.

Or when her mom would show up at her door and her dad would announce that they were back together again and Peter would hold her hand tightly under the dinner table.

She knew they’d be alright when he had got down on one knee and asked her to marry him with tears in his eyes.

She knew that they’d be alright when she saw him hold their baby girl in his arms for the first time.

She knew whenever she woke up next to him, his mouth half-open as he’d pull her closer to him, mumbling in her ear, making her giggle against his chest.

**fin.**

**Author's Note:**

> follow me @/riarkledale on tumblr to send me requests or for updates on my other spideychelle fic, 'i am your sweetheart psychopathic crush'.


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